Can I Buy You a Drink?

Can I buy you a Drink? So, you are at a club, lounge, bar, or restaurant. A man approaches you and says, "how are you doing this evening? Can I buy you a drink?"

What is your first reaction? "Hell Yeah, it's a recession, I'd rather spend your money than mine! Let me get 2 Long Island Ice Teas!" or "No, Thank you." Or "That is so nice of you, but I will pass" or "That is nice of you, Yes, I will take you up on that offer."

So, let's say you take the drink. Let me tell you the proper etiquette. When a man offers to buy you a drink, he isn't just giving it away for no reason. He is not just buying a drink for every woman there with a pink shirt on (or what ever color you are wearing). He IS buying you a drink so that he may have a conversation with you. He obviously was attracted to something about you and wanted to talk to you to see if you were interested in him and if he likes what he hears when it comes out your mouth.

So, with that being said, when you accept the drink, you are "non-verbally" telling the gentleman that you think he is attractive enough to date and you are willing to spend time talking with him to see if there is a connection. If you have a boyfriend, dating someone seriously, married, engaged, etc. Then you probably want to tell this man "no, thank you." If you are in some type of relationship, then you are NOT available and this man wants to know if you are available. When you say "Yes, please by me a drink," you are telling him that you are available. There is no other way to piss a man off by accepting a drink, talk to him and tell him that you are married, engaged, or have a boyfriend. If that is the case, don't accept the drink, that is rude and it is a recession!

How long? Well, maybe just until you finish your drink. Maybe a little longer if you are having good conversation. If things are not going well, please end the conversation properly. Tell him, "Thank you so very much for the drink (his name), it was nice meeting you, I am going to leave now to " go with your friends, bathroom, whatever If you leave and you did not offer to take his number, give him yours, or any hints that you would like to see him later, chances are, he understand that you are not interested. On the flip side, some men have it twisted as well. They think that because they bought the lady a drink, that she is their property for the night, she HAS to provide the telephone number, she has to dance with him, or she has to listen to him talk to her ALL night. Ladies, that is not the case. If you find yourself in this situation, let him know "I appreciate the drink, but I am about to hang out with my girls" or leave or what ever you have to say to let him know that you want to part ways. If he is still following you around you can say "I really enjoyed the drink, the conversation, I was debating on whether or not to give you may phone number, but you are following me around, it is a real turn off, can you give me some space please." Hopefully this works, if not, then you probably have a stalker and you need to tell security lol.

So, for men. After you bought the lady a drink, ask questions, get to know her and tell her a little about yourself as well. The time is ticking. If she is still engaged into a good conversation with you, laughing, smiling and giving you eye contact, and you are at least 10 minutes into the conversation, you need to start feeling her out. If you have a smooth way to get the telephone number or to give her yours, you need to do this NOW. You do not want to over stay your welcome. Plus, the longer you talk to someone while you are drinking, the more likely you are going to say something stupid. Exchanged numbers and get the hell outta there! You want to peek her interest so that she will want to call you. You don't want to talk to her all night, then she is not going to want to talk to you later, hell, what more is there to know, you talked all night. So, your best bet is to leave. You don't have to leave the club, but leave from the area, you do not want to be seen as if you are staring at her all night or stalking her. If you are there with your boys, go hang with them. But DO NOT, I repeat, DO NOT try to talk to another female and get another telephone number. The lady you just spoke to could of really be digging you, but she sees you talking to another girl and another drink and your chances to get with her just went out the window.

So, ladies, if you accept the drink, it means you are interested, if you don't accepted it, it means you are not interested.

Men, if she doesn't want your drink, do NOT beg, she doesn't like you and if you insist to buy her a drink and she doesn't give you any holler, you can't be mad, you forced it on her. If she DOES accept the drink, it does not mean that she is your girlfriend for the night either!